We have this program, that handles database connections and returns the data for us. We're using it to query multiple databases at once. (No, I don't know why we can't do that ourselves.)
It doesn't support dates. If you try and pull a date value out of a database, it will return with an "undefined" value. But we need dates.
So I come up with a plan. I can write a JDBC wrapper that wraps around the actual JDBC drivers and "mask" the existance of dates in the results. That way the data can be in a format that actually works.
Except that it turns out this program is smarter than I thought it was and actually had the database do queries for it instead of just pulling in the data and manipulating it itself. (Although now I'm left wondering why it's so slow to do so.)